You'll Never Believe It!!

Have you heard the news? What a crazy day…

First I heard on the radio that we now have to eat SEVEN portions of fruit and vegetables per day to maintain a healthy lifestyle, upgraded from five.

Then I saw in my newspaper that chickens are starting to lay square eggs… Horrendous!

And now I’ve just discovered that we’re jailing innocent men… What’s going on there?

Word has it that, back in 1985, a young mother suffering from mental illness tragically took the lives of her parents and children before her own. Unbelievably traumatic, yes. But, without the support mechanisms that many of those in her condition would benefit from nowadays, it is not entirely unfathomable.

Anyway… soon after, folks started poking the finger at her brother, Jeremy. Not seemingly for any particular reason – i.e. him actually committing the offences  - but more likely out of either shame, embarrassment, greed or any share of the above.

In any case, I hear this Jeremy ended up in jail, and is still there! This despite the fact that he managed to apparently kill five persons (his own family in their own home, don’t forget) without leaving a single trace of evidence.

A fair few people buggered up and fluffed their lines here so tracks needed to be covered (like bicycle tracks in mud, only there weren’t any), lies needed to be told and corruption needed to be committed! Oh yeah it sounds like they had a right old knees-up making sure he took the fall.

What an affair. Flying bikes, wet suits, clocks that work backwards, tricks of the light, musical telephones and a bowl of sugar. And you did read me right – this was back in 1985. Nearly 30 years ago!

Okay, okay. APRIL FOOLS!!!!

 This news story was also not quite true...

Hahaha! Did I get you?? Sorry, I just couldn’t hold it in any more. I’ve just actually wet myself!

Come on. You didn’t actually think we’d jail someone for life for murdering five members of his own family without any evidence or fact to base the conviction on, did you?

You didn’t genuinely believe that the half-cocked, Jeremy-has-horns HOBNOB theories did you?

No, no. You silly beans. That sort of thing doesn’t happen in the real world. Happy April Fools, everyone!

Karma Has Dreadlocks...

Hello. A wise bear once told me "...if you do bad things, bad things will happen to you - that's just karma."   The bear was right you know.

I'm a nice blogger who does nice things, yet bad things do still happen to me - I stubbed my toe the other day. Horrific. So you know it isn't an exact science, but the theme is generally sound.

Jeremy Bamber is a good egg; he doesn't do bad things like stealing schoolkids' lunch money, farting at a vicar or murdering his entire family, for instance. Yet bad things are happening to him - like spending about 30 years in prison as an innocent man. Not good.

However, karma is alive and well in some parts of Essex and beyond. Some might say that those who spend their time collecting things like hoover dust and vast, vast amounts of sound moderators have indeed done some naughty things in their time, so what might become of them?

If life has a natural justice, then it shall come to pass that they'll be violated quite substantially by this lady. Her name is Kharma. She's a professional wrestler, you know. And a big one at that. Look at the size of her.

You wouldn't want her to leap on top of you now would you? No sir. I am afraid however it may be unavoidable. The folk who conspired to send Jeremy to prison will soon gaze into the future and see this hurtling towards them at considerable speed, albeit in a metaphorical way. We couldn't possibly afford to hire "Kharma" to go around and sit on them all, as quirky as that would be.

A glimpse into the future!

So, like any good soap opera and like any good professional wrestling match, karma tends to follow a bit of a script and the outcome is already determined - life merely allows us to live through to that ending. For those of us with the power to think independently (and the ability to count bodies accurately and tell the difference between 'male' and 'female'...); what happens next is clear.

Kharma's a bitch! She also looks good with dreadlocks...

Bamber Book Club

I do love a good read and write session, you know. That’s why I made a blog after all. Can’t beat a good book.

So it got me thinking: What if Jeremiah Bamberoonie (Jeremy Bamber to you and I) wrote himself a book about the adventures, thrills and spills of the last 30-or-so years? What form might it take?

After all, that whole suffering the devastating loss of your whole family with absolutely no victim support, being accused of killing them with absolutely no evidence whatsoever and then imprisoned for life for it – despite that imprisonment being totally illegal in itself….  Yes, I’m sure that’s a real squeal of a tale and would give 50 Shades a run for its money in terms of sauce!

Seriously,  Jeremy will be free soon enough, that’s for sure, and if he ever feels like penning his story then it will definitely shame a lot of people. For now, we can only speculate. It could look like this, for instance:

GOOD BOOK?

Sort of like an Alcatraz-cum-Shawshank excitement feel to it, don’t you think? I like the idea that it’s all about to change and that for the clutch of weirdos who happily made this happen to him there will be no way back. So yes, I suspect it might be something like that.

If that’s the ‘good eggs’, what about the ‘bad eggs’? Any idea what their book would look like?

Well, funny you should ask – cos I’ve managed to snare me a copy. I did enquire originally if I could be sent a copy but was told that they had all been destroyed/could not be traced, and yet low and behold, I found it! Bit of a recurring theme.

Anyway, here it is:

BAD BOOK!

The ‘explains-all’ textbook on how to imprison Jeremy Bamber. Would go very nicely with the Cooking with Jeremy tutorial, from a past blog.

Just as well it’s an idiot’s guide, eh?

Bamber to (Moon) Walk Free?

Presumably this is how our man Bamber will exit his cell...

 I’ve got a problem.

I woke up this morning, looked at the telly box and saw that Gordon Brown was still Prime Minister. What the bugger am I gonna do?

It gets worse.

Katie Price and Peter Andre are getting divorced, Wogan is quitting the breakfast show, I’ve gone and caught Swine Flu and Michael Jackson has just died!!!! Ahh!

Yes folks, it is 2009 again. Or at least some time around then anyway.

I know this cos David Boutflour tells me so in the newspaper I was using to dab the wee wee out of my cat’s litter box this morning.

Big bad murderer man Jeremy Bamber is in prison you see, and Mr Boutflour suggests there is no chance he should be released for at least another three or four years from now, maybe 2012 or 2013?

He says:  "He should stay in prison unless he is proven innocent or he has served the time suggested by the judge."

Well that’s super news! Cos the Judge said a minimum of 25 years, David. Wakey wakey, It’s actually 2013 and 25 years passed a long, long time ago. Does that mean Jeremy can come out to play now?

 As for “unless he is proven innocent”, well now you’re just being a saucy devil. We got that one sorted many a year ago you silly bean.

Luckily some of us, after all this time, now know stuff that you know, but nobody else does. Isn’t that good fun.

Let’s party, like it’s 1999!! Or should that be 2009??

Fool Me Once....?

 Here’s one to wrap up your weekend with.

The super Police folk involved in convicting Jeremy Bamber of the murder of his entire family would have you believe that at first, way back on August 7, 1986 ‘twas Bamber who tricked scores of Police officers and medical personnel into believing his sister Sheila had murdered her relatives before taking her own life when in fact – they say – it was he who did for them all.

They would have you believe that once and only once were they tricked – but then they got wise to that devious rascal and put all the pieces together and it wasn’t long before they knew the truth...!

Zzzzz...

Let’s have a looksie here, shall we. Let’s disregard everything we know about the lack of crime scene preservation by police, the sheer lack of respect shown by them to Jeremy’s dead relatives, the logs, the loudhailer – everything. Let’s just wipe it from our brains and start again.

Let us go along with the fantasy that, somehow, Jeremy did manage to trick each and every one of these people. Every person from every profession – each of them bamboozled.

Okay, fine. They got duped once, but never again. Oh no.Them's too smart.

Except, it would seem, master magician Bamber managed it again – or so this log you see before you would appear to suggest.

You see, back in the real world, not only do we know that everything that happened that night – both inside the house, outside the house and back inside the house once police went in, points to Jeremy being an innocent – but the Police knew it too.

We know that as late on as September – almost a full month after the killings – D. Supt Ainsley says in this interview that a ‘review’ of the case was to be carried out on his orders.

This review, he says, was carried out. It’s conclusion?

He states: “When Kenneally [fellow officer] was asked to give us the results of his review, he stated that the evidence indicated that Sheila was responsible.”

How very mysterious. A review carried out a month after the killings confirmed the original verdict – yet how is that it has never been disclosed just what evidence was used to carry out this review or indeed what it uncovered?

The FACT here – not opinion – the FACT, is that the Police staged their own review of everything they found and saw that night and still found Sheila to be responsible. So they'll say they were duped again, eh?

Do we still blame Harry ‘Bamber’ Houdini, then? Or is it about time the justice system and those responsible finally admitted to what they knew then and what they know now – Jeremy Bamber is innocent and should be freed.

Introducing

This is a blog run by an individual campaigning for the release of prisoner Jeremy Bamber. 

Jeremy was wrongly convicted on the basis of fabricated evidence of the murder of his entire family in 1985 and has been behind bars almost ever since. 

With each passing year, more and more documented evidence emerges that has been kept under-wraps previously - in support of his innocence and totally destroying the original prosecution case that should never have been allowed to be heard.

Simply, this blog highlights some of the key issues and brings further into the public domain the shocking treatment of an innocent man. 

Whilst I am grateful to the Official Jeremy Bamber Campaign for their support, I must stress that this is a Blog run entirely independently and the views expressed here do not necessarily reflect those of Jeremy Bamber or his Campaign.

The Campaign website can be found at www.jeremy-bamber.co.uk.