Monday, 27 May 2013

5,000 So Soon?


 Alright there my blogger mates? Just thought I would pop my head around the door and see how we were doing and make brief mention of the number 5,000.

 Five thousand indeed. What's that, you say? "Is that number of reasons I can count to say that Jeremy Bamber is innocent?" Nope. Close, but nope.

" Is that the number of fabricated lies, stories and fantasies spread by Police, ex girlfriend, Jessica Fletcher and Hercule Poirot?"  Well, you're getting warmer but nope.

"5,000, Mr Blogger man, is that the number of approximate attempts it takes to spell 'scene' correctly in the Annual Essex Police Spelling Bee?" That's VERY good! But not the one I'm after...

 No, no... 5,000 is the number of page views this here blog has had since we started the whole thing and began taking the royal p*ss out of people who should really, really have known better 27 years ago than to start messing about with something so seriously. A modest start. but it'll do.

Sadly for you naughty guys and gals, though: it may have taken 27 years but the truth is finally getting out. The clock ticks, the tide turns, and you, my lovelies, are screwed! Oops!

Thursday, 23 May 2013

Bamber, Time Lord...

Ahh the Back to the Future films. Remember them? One of the best things to come out of the 80s, cinematically.

You remember, it was all good stuff. Boy goes back in time, has his mother fall in love with him instead of his father and then they help send a police car out to White House Farm in Essex cos the Big Bad Wolf of Tolleshunt D'Arcy, Jeremy Bamber has killed his entire family.

That’s how it went, wasn’t it? That’s how it seems, anyway. Confused? Well, never fear my bloggeroonies, I shall once again explain all.  We all know out here in the real world that Jeremy Bamber did not kill his family. Ironically his biggest crime was in not killing them – purely because, in being innocent, he’s far too big a risk to the lawmakers of the land and so sits in jail for nearly a third decade.

Log of Jeremy's call to police

Anyhow...... Have a look at this – it’s a call, made by Jeremy to police from his home which is about ten or so minutes away from where the tragedy took place. You can see here that he explains that his father called him in a panic saying that things had clearly got out of hand – Jeremy asks for help. Simple enough there.

Jeremy's father Nevill contacts police

 Now look at this one. It’s a telephone call made by Jeremy’s father, Nevill, to police around about ten minutes before Jeremy’s one to Police. It says that his “daughter” had gone “berserk” with a gun and so understandably required Police assistance. Simple enough there.

Yet Jeremy Bamber is the man in prison. Why for, you wonder? Well, because police claim that Jeremy lied and that his father never did call him and that when he [Jeremy] called police to say so, he was telling porkies. To explain the second log, from Nevill, they claim it was merely an officer copying down what Jeremy had claimed Nevill had told him and giving that call its own record. Why police would feel the need to make retrospective record of a call when neither participant was the Police is beyond me.

 Now, there are about 403 reasons why the above is a load of old toff and why Nevill’s call to police was exactly that.  I want to make this very simple though. Look at both logs carefully. You can see that Jeremy, as detailed by Police, called them at 3:36am. Look now at Nevill’s log. You can see that police dispatched a car (CA7) to the scene at 3:35am. Answer me this – if Nevill did NOT call the police and the only call the police took that night was from Jeremy, to what, where and why did they dispatch a police car one minute before they even received that call?

The answer is simple. It was Doc and Marty McFly. They’d seen it all in the future and decided to call the coppers in advance of Jeremy’s call to try and help out a bit. It’s Back to the Future and an episode of the Bill and Dr Who all in one baby! That's right, sod the TARDIS you mother, give me a cop car!

Or.... back in the real world – Police dispatched the car because Nevill Bamber, fearing for the lives of himself, wife, daughter and grandsons, desperately called them for help. It’s the call that they tried to hide – the ‘Nevill Call Log’ took almost 20 years to surface – and it’s since been the call they’ve tried to cover up.  No more. 

Monday, 13 May 2013

Attenborough's Stealth

Shhh! Stealthily does it, David. If in doubt, use a sledgehammer...

 We’ve said many a time for the fact that if it weren’t so very tragic, if five people hadn’t lost their lives, if two little boys had not died in their sleep and had an innocent man not been stitched up to face decades in jail for all of it despite going through the trauma of losing his whole family – if it weren’t for ALL of that…. You’d have to say the case of Jeremy Bamber is right rip-roar, a real laugh.

It’s full of comedy moments – you know, like the Let’s-convict-a-man-with-no-evidence-only-heresay-and-conjecture sort of stuff. Good job the Edinburgh Fringe Festival is coming up cos’ some of the people who thought this lot up really should be on stage.

Let’s look at another aspect – STEALTH! You know, what David Attenborough uses when he interviews rhinos and lions for the telly and that. When he sits down and whispers really quietly so they don’t eat him up. That’s stealth for you.

Dictionary definition: “movement that is quiet and careful in order not to be seen or heard, or secret action.” Yes, yes, that’s stealth for you.

Wanna know what isn’t stealth?

Smashing a door down with a sledgehammer! That’s how the firearms team chose to enter the Farmhouse at Whitehouse Farm. Funny, really, cos one statement that says that the use of “hand signals and whispers” was employed because they believed Sheila to be alive and/or armed inside the house.

Fair enough, you might well think that it is perfectly reasonable to approach the house using STEALTH and then bash your way in and you may be right but even in amongst all my teasing above, we all miss the point… The point being that whether they used whispers, a sledgehammer or a bloomin sausage roll – they all believed Sheila to be alive.

Why did they believe she was alive? Maybe because they saw her in the house? Maybe because they were in conversation with her? It really matters not – the fact is, she was alive.

But we aren’t allowed to say that! No, instead in this comedy world we’re asked to accept that Sheila was never moving between downstairs and upstairs, several officers were hallucinating when they saw her body in the kitchen, she was never recorded on the open line inside the house, tapes of which we’ve never, ever been able to hear and Jeremy Bamber is almost certainly responsible for all of it – this is what we’re told to believe.

Yes indeed, it would be funny if it weren’t so very tragic.